Eurovision 2014
May. 10th, 2014 06:29 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
imwalde1. Ukraine - Human hamster wheel, ha! It's an upbeat pop song, fairly catchy. Not bad. And not a fricking ballad, so hallelujah.
2. Belarus - "I'm tired of being your sweet cheesecake." HAHHAHHAHA. A sentiment perhaps never before captured in song. So terrible, I can see it being a favorite. And still not a ballad, so whoo!
3. Azerbaijan - Ballad, yawn. Her voice is pretty good, but this song is meh.
4. Iceland - Colorblock dudes singing a pop rock song? YES. Love the sound. The words might be a bit stupid, but I can't make them all out. Hehehe, synchronized dancing. Cute overall.
5. Norway - He sounds a little like Tracy Chapman. Don't hate it as much as I do most ballads, but I do hate the way he keeps creepily staring directly into the camera.
6. Romania - This is the kind of pop techno-y song that is not my fave, but usually does pretty well in Eurovision voting. Circle keyboard prop is confusing. Her gestures are a smidge Spring Awakening.
7. Armenia - Zzzzzzzzzzz at first, but at least it picks up energy at the end.
8. Montenegro - The first non-English song. his voice isn't bad, but the song is a bit of a snoozer. The faux ice skater is an interesting touch.
9. Poland - Hahahahhaha, amazing. Another (partially) non-English song, but this one I wish I knew what she was saying, because I bet it's hilarious. From what I could understand an ode to Slavic girls? The first folk(ish) dress, but with sexy butter churning and clothes washing.
10. Greece - Hahahahaha, cheese with hiphop posturing. Can't decide if "Rise Up" is exclusively a sexual innuendo? The trampolines are a fun touch.
11. Austria - A memorable singer, if generic song. I don't know enough to pick a pronoun, but very good voice. Please be the next Hedwig!
12. Germany - Accordion! I like her voice. Song's just ok, but a good showcase for her voice. Bet she covers lots of Pink songs.
13. Sweden - Another good singer with a pretty generic song. Zzzzzzz.
14. France - Why am I not surprised the France entry is in French. I instinctively hate them on sight. The one guy is like Weird Al and Judah Friedlander had a kid, and lead guy is an unholy crossing of Kid from Kid N' Play and Peewee Herman. It is somehow, though, quintessentially Eurovision.
15. Russia - Hahahaha, like someone thought Abba was on the right track but needed twins and see-saw. What are they holding? Surprisingly, I don't hate the song. It had nice harmony.
16. Italy - OMG AMAZING OUTFITS. Instant favorite. Wish I knew what she was saying. Her voice is good, and the music is catchy, so hopefully the lyrics aren't stupid.
17. Slovenia - Is she really playing that flute? Don't hate it, but not my fave. This also feels quintessentially Eurovision. Partially non-English, too.
18. Finland - Catchy, upbeat, and sung by a cutie. Sold! New favorite!
19. Spain - Another partially non-English. Another generic ballad. Her voice deserves a better song. What did her tattoo say?
20. Switzerland - Hello adorables! Catchy! Yes. Approve.
21. Hungary - Not sure a child abuse song was the way to go? At least it became up tempo. Would never have guessed this dude was representing Hungary. Accent-wise, he sounds American.
22. Malta - Would-be Mumford and Sons. Like it.
23. Denmark - Kind of cute. Don't hate it.
24. Netherlands - Do they have mile markers in Holland? Shouldn't they be kilometer markers? This song has nice harmony. Strange how it's very US country in sound.
25. San Marino - Ballad, sigh. Her voice is good, but song is meh.
26. UK - It at least is not the things I hate most, but still leaves me largely unmoved. Her name is Molly, I wish I liked her song more.
My favorites: Finland, Switzerland, Malta, and Italy. The so WTF they are nearly great: Poland and Belarus.
Hahaha, love the surprising Graham Norton and other commentators. The 12 song, WHAT IS HAPPEN. It has to be seen to be believed. The Eurovision museum segment was pretty funny, though.
As per usual my tastes are not matched up with who does well, because clearly not everyone shares my boredom with ballads. Also I'm not a savvy enough fan to predict the voting blocks. (The booing of every mention of Russia is vaguely uncomfortable. I mean, I get it, but at the same time, pretty sure the blonde twin singers aren't responsible for military strategy, you know?) I would not have predicted Austria to win by such a margin, but I do enjoy that everyone in Europe united to hate the French song. 2 points, hahahah.
See you next year in Vienna, Eurovision!
2. Belarus - "I'm tired of being your sweet cheesecake." HAHHAHHAHA. A sentiment perhaps never before captured in song. So terrible, I can see it being a favorite. And still not a ballad, so whoo!
3. Azerbaijan - Ballad, yawn. Her voice is pretty good, but this song is meh.
4. Iceland - Colorblock dudes singing a pop rock song? YES. Love the sound. The words might be a bit stupid, but I can't make them all out. Hehehe, synchronized dancing. Cute overall.
5. Norway - He sounds a little like Tracy Chapman. Don't hate it as much as I do most ballads, but I do hate the way he keeps creepily staring directly into the camera.
6. Romania - This is the kind of pop techno-y song that is not my fave, but usually does pretty well in Eurovision voting. Circle keyboard prop is confusing. Her gestures are a smidge Spring Awakening.
7. Armenia - Zzzzzzzzzzz at first, but at least it picks up energy at the end.
8. Montenegro - The first non-English song. his voice isn't bad, but the song is a bit of a snoozer. The faux ice skater is an interesting touch.
9. Poland - Hahahahhaha, amazing. Another (partially) non-English song, but this one I wish I knew what she was saying, because I bet it's hilarious. From what I could understand an ode to Slavic girls? The first folk(ish) dress, but with sexy butter churning and clothes washing.
10. Greece - Hahahahaha, cheese with hiphop posturing. Can't decide if "Rise Up" is exclusively a sexual innuendo? The trampolines are a fun touch.
11. Austria - A memorable singer, if generic song. I don't know enough to pick a pronoun, but very good voice. Please be the next Hedwig!
12. Germany - Accordion! I like her voice. Song's just ok, but a good showcase for her voice. Bet she covers lots of Pink songs.
13. Sweden - Another good singer with a pretty generic song. Zzzzzzz.
14. France - Why am I not surprised the France entry is in French. I instinctively hate them on sight. The one guy is like Weird Al and Judah Friedlander had a kid, and lead guy is an unholy crossing of Kid from Kid N' Play and Peewee Herman. It is somehow, though, quintessentially Eurovision.
15. Russia - Hahahaha, like someone thought Abba was on the right track but needed twins and see-saw. What are they holding? Surprisingly, I don't hate the song. It had nice harmony.
16. Italy - OMG AMAZING OUTFITS. Instant favorite. Wish I knew what she was saying. Her voice is good, and the music is catchy, so hopefully the lyrics aren't stupid.
17. Slovenia - Is she really playing that flute? Don't hate it, but not my fave. This also feels quintessentially Eurovision. Partially non-English, too.
18. Finland - Catchy, upbeat, and sung by a cutie. Sold! New favorite!
19. Spain - Another partially non-English. Another generic ballad. Her voice deserves a better song. What did her tattoo say?
20. Switzerland - Hello adorables! Catchy! Yes. Approve.
21. Hungary - Not sure a child abuse song was the way to go? At least it became up tempo. Would never have guessed this dude was representing Hungary. Accent-wise, he sounds American.
22. Malta - Would-be Mumford and Sons. Like it.
23. Denmark - Kind of cute. Don't hate it.
24. Netherlands - Do they have mile markers in Holland? Shouldn't they be kilometer markers? This song has nice harmony. Strange how it's very US country in sound.
25. San Marino - Ballad, sigh. Her voice is good, but song is meh.
26. UK - It at least is not the things I hate most, but still leaves me largely unmoved. Her name is Molly, I wish I liked her song more.
My favorites: Finland, Switzerland, Malta, and Italy. The so WTF they are nearly great: Poland and Belarus.
Hahaha, love the surprising Graham Norton and other commentators. The 12 song, WHAT IS HAPPEN. It has to be seen to be believed. The Eurovision museum segment was pretty funny, though.
As per usual my tastes are not matched up with who does well, because clearly not everyone shares my boredom with ballads. Also I'm not a savvy enough fan to predict the voting blocks. (The booing of every mention of Russia is vaguely uncomfortable. I mean, I get it, but at the same time, pretty sure the blonde twin singers aren't responsible for military strategy, you know?) I would not have predicted Austria to win by such a margin, but I do enjoy that everyone in Europe united to hate the French song. 2 points, hahahah.
See you next year in Vienna, Eurovision!
